If you really thought I was writing about politics, you’re dumber than you look…tumblr_oejf4kwlzo1u9tdblo1_400

The NFL has reached the midway mark, which means one thing…it is time for my midseason awards. Grab your popcorn and see which players made the cut.

MVP: Derek Carr, Raiders

This one was tough because you have a slew of players who are deserving like Tom Brady, Ezekiel Elliot and Matt Ryan. My guy is Derek Carr. The Raiders are 7-2 and he is the motor that keeps that team running. That offense is as fun to watch as any. I love that he has improved each and every year since entering the league. Right now, he is leading the core of the future at the QB position.

Stats: 66% completion, 2,505 yards, 17 TDs, 3 Ints

Offensive Player of the Year: David Johnson, Cardinals

The Cardinals are having a down year to say the least, especially with the lofty preseason expectations. David Johnson, however, is not. You want to talk about a do it all feature back, look no further. Boy, was I fucking wrong about him? I thought there would be a time share in Arizona. He has been the one bright spot on a mediocre Arizona squad. He is on pace to break 1,400 yards on the ground and 800 yards in the passing game. Marshall Faulk anyone? Pretty good.1ca

Stats: 705 rush yards, 407 receiving yards, 8 TDs

Defensive Player of the Year: Aaron Donald, Rams

The obvious pick here is Miller because he leads the league in sacks. He has the glamour stats. Fuck glamour. Give me the nitty-gritty down and dirty. That is Aaron freaking Donald. He is on pace for another season with double digit sacks. He has five so far. He also has hit the QB 19 times this year, leading the league thus far. He plays on the interior defensive line, a little harder to get in the backfield from there, but he does it. Von Miller can’t lick Donald’s jock.

Stats: 5 sacks, 8 stuffs, 19 QB hits, 1 forced fumble

Offensive Rookie of the Year: Ezekiel Elliot, Cowboys

Do I really need to explain this one? The guy is every bit as good as he was hyped up to be. He hasn’t missed a beat since being drafted. Zeke is the man, period. He is leading the league in rushing and on pace for 1,800 yards as a rookie.

Stats: 891 yards, 5.0 yards per carry, 8 TDs

Defensive Rookie of the Year: Joey Bosa, Chargers

He missed the first four games of the season due to a holdout, but here is a case of another top draft pick who is living up to all the hype. He has four sacks in five games as a rookie and has hit the QB 10 times. Ironically, both of my rookies come from Ohio State.

Stats: 4 sacks, 2 stuffs, 10 QB hits

Comeback Player of the Year: DeMarco Murray, Titans

I know he wasn’t injured, but may as well have been. Chip Kelly took the man who won the rushing title in 2014 and turned him into hot garbage. He is looking like classic DeMarco Murray again. For everyone who thought Derrick Henry would have the starting job by this point, jokes on you. Stupid Idiot.

Stats: 807 yards, 4.6 yards per carry, 9 TDs

Coach of the Year: Bill Belichick, PatriotsBill-Bellichek-Stare.gif

No other coach should ever win this award again. He traded his best pass rusher in Chandler Jones. He just traded his best defensive player in Jamie Collins. He went 3-1 without the god that is Tom Brady. Belichick over everything. The guy is unreal. The Bills also talked shit after giving them their only loss and he exacted revenge by curb stomping their heads into the ground.

Stats: Will eat your fucking soul if you annoy him

 

 

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