Sometimes in life, crazy and unexplainable things happen. Kind of like when the Falcons blew a 25-point lead in the Super Bowl, heyooooo!
My wife, Mallisa, and two of her best friends, Chelsea Pitre and Katie Haslauer, grew up together. PS that was weird for me to write out the new names considering you guys are still saved in my phone as Becnel and Tardo. Changing that now, don’t worry.
Even though they grew up together, it wasn’t until college where they built a friendship that will last a lifetime.
These girls grew up together, but never really spoke much to each other. Katie and Chelsea started connecting in high school. Mallisa didn’t know either of them from a ham sandwich prior to college. We had our own group of friends that we would hang out with.
Life tends to bring people together, like it did for these three awesome women.
“We are three girls who grew up in the same town, went to the same middle and high school, had mutual friends, but never realized how much we all clicked until college,” Chelsea said. “I think it was supposed to be that way, we made our way through grade school separately and developed into our own people which makes it so interesting when we get together. We haven’t always had each other to run to or copy off of, but growing into an adult was a hell of a lot easier with Katie and Mallisa.”
I remember when Mallisa told me she was rooming with Chelsea. I was happy for her because I figured it would be great that she could branch off and befriend someone new, even though she knew Chelsea for almost her entire life.
I knew Chelsea through a friend who used to date her. I didn’t know her well, but I knew her enough to remember having a conversation with her freshman year of high school on her ex-boyfriend’s phone about a relationship issue. Based on what I knew, she always seemed nice enough.
My wife is definitely an introvert, so she doesn’t let people in very easily. It took a trip to the hospital with kidney stones for her and Chelsea to really spark their friendship. I remember playing Madden in my friends dorm when I got the call from Chelsea and I thought it was some sort of joke. Side note, I won that game of Madden so fuck off, Jeremy and Phil. Chelsea had to convince me she wasn’t full of shit.
That night began the start of a great friendship. That trickled into Katie and Mallisa becoming best friends as well. Although these women are so different, Katie says that is what makes their friendship special.
“We all have totally different personalities but they mesh well together,” Katie said. “We bring the best out in each other.”
These girls also have one major common denominator, they all married their high school sweethearts, which is pretty fucking cool if you ask me.
The Big News
Sometimes life can’t be explained. Maybe some of it is luck. Maybe some of it is fate. Maybe some of it is a higher power at work. We will never know. Life works in mysterious ways though.
That mystery came full circle for my wife when they all told each other they were expecting.
“I still to this day can’t believe it played out like this. We all started trying to conceive at different times, followed each other and gave support when month by month the outcomes weren’t what we wanted,” Chelsea said. “There is no way to explain this but God, and His timing. Whether you believe or not, we are never on our own time. Someone in higher places knew we would need each other and timed it up like this. I have no other way to explain it.”
Given the circumstances for what Mallisa and I experienced throughout the process of trying, everything happens for a reason. I, for one, am so happy she gets to experience this process with them. That is a sentiment all three of them share.
“It’s fun to have someone there for you who knows exactly what you are going through,” Mallisa said. “Since our due dates are all so close, we are going through a lot of the same symptoms at the same time.”
The three of them had planned to go to dinner at Rotolo’s in Destrehan. They figured one of them had big news to share, but they never suspected that all of them would be expecting a baby. It is funny because all of their stories for describing that night are all pretty much identical.
“Katie and Chelsea picked me up and I couldn’t hold in the news anymore so I blurted out that I was pregnant. They were both ecstatic. Then Chelsea shows me an ultrasound picture. I about died. I just thought ‘No freaking way!’ Then Katie said she took what she thought was a positive test earlier that day. I may have almost vomited or maybe it was because I was pregnant and hungry,” Mallisa said. “It took a bit for it all to set in, but I was so excited. To be able to go through it with two of my best friends was going to be such a fun adventure.”
Katie shared her side of the story and much like Mallisa, she felt shocked and excited.
“That night was crazy! Chelsea had already told me she was expecting but I couldn’t wait to see Mallisa’s reaction,” Katie said. “Well earlier that day I took a pregnancy test and got a super faint line and had Chelsea come confirm she saw it too. Little did we know when we would pick up Mallisa she would tell us she was expecting too. After Mallisa told us her news, Chelsea and I were like well we are too. I was in shock and so excited for all of us.”
Chelsea couldn’t even remember if she ate because she was so focused on the idea of being pregnant with her friends. She did remember trying to be discreet because Destrehan is a small town and she didn’t want the secrets out.
“We decided to go to dinner together, rarely happens due to work schedules so we all knew something important was brewing for one of us to share. We picked up Mallisa at her home and before we even left the driveway she says something along the lines of ‘I forgot y’alls Christmas present…but I’M PREGNANT!’ I had my own ultrasound in my hand ready to blurt it out as well, how could I not? So after showing my excitement for my girl, I shouted ‘By the way, I’m pregnant too!’ I remember being unsure if Katie would blurt out that her piss soaked urine test where sitting in a ziplock bag between us in the center console…low and behold Katie whips them out,” Chelsea said. “So there we were, three friends just going to dinner to tell same secret. We ate at Rotolo’s and had to whisper the whole time due to knowing people in the restaurant. I couldn’t even tell you what we ordered or if we even ate it.”
After getting home, I knew I wanted to tell Gavin myself before Chelsea could.
I remember telling Mallisa I was going to call Gavin (Chelsea’s boo) to tell him our news. She was fine with that. I called Gavin to tell him we were expecting and I was met by an abrupt halt saying “hang on, I will call you back. My mom is calling.”
Yeah, ok. I knew something was up as soon as he said that. It didn’t help that I was walking into the house and Mallisa had a shit eating grin on her face when I told her who I was talking to. I am like I just told you I am going to be a dad and you are calling me back all of a sudden. I know you love your mom, but that is odd.
Well he called Chelsea to ask her if he could tell me. He did call me back a few minutes later and dropped the bomb on me. I heard Mallisa start laughing maniacally in the background.
That was a great day to say the least. I think all of them would agree.
Since then, the three of them have enjoyed healthy pregnancies thus far. They all love that they have a support system in place. They can truly relate to each other and what each of them is going through emotionally and physically.
“Since our due dates are all so close, we are going through a lot of the same symptoms at the same time. We text most days about something baby related. Now we are all getting increasingly uncomfortable and it’s nice to have your best friend know exactly what you are feeling,” Mallisa said. “Sometimes we can give each other advice and sometimes we just all complain together about how we are hurting.”
Chelsea said the group message has become a daily chat room for asking questions like “is this normal? Why do I look like a whale in this shirt?” or “Baby H check up today, say prayers.”
The three of them have found comfort in laughing and taking a light hearted approach to pregnancy.
“Our group text messages have been quite funny the last few months. Whether it has been texting about bedding, baby kicks, cravings, or changes with our bodies,” Katie said. “For instance last week I mentioned to them that I was feeling extra large that day. Mallisa responded that she has starting making noises when she gets up out of chairs and Chelsea said she needs to be on oxygen. So the best part has to be being able to laugh about all the good and bad things about our pregnancies together.”
Names and Genders
Being separated by only about a month and a half, these three women are trucking along and almost there. I know Mallisa and I are counting down the days, just like our friends, to meet our sweet bundles of joy.
Mallisa and I are waiting on the arrival of our sweet Finn. In short, we wanted something that worked well with age and something simple and strong. We landed on Finn. It just always clicked for us. We chose Joseph for the middle because that is both of our father’s middle name. Win-Win. Click here for the full story behind his name.
Chelsea and Gavin are awaiting the debut of their son, Emmett James Pitre. For Chelsea, she always believed the name should make her smile when you say it.
“Emmett wasn’t a name I’ve heard often, it just clicked in my heart and made me smile. So I knew it was right,” Chelsea said. “And when Gavin didn’t make a disgusted face when I suggested it, I knew we had a winner.”
The name James has no significance other than Chelsea can’t say it without a southern twang, which admittedly she is a sucker for.
For Katie and Kevin, they broke the boy train when they announced they were having a sweet little girl.
They landed on the name Abby Lee Haslauer. They both loved the name Abby. They used Lee to pay homage to Katie’s mawmaw who the both of them were very close to.
Expectations of Pregnancy
As their pregnancies are coming to a close, they all had different expectations for what would happen physically and emotionally.
Mallisa says it is better than she expected. I can tell you with full confidence that this girl used to tell me “I want to be big and pregnant.” She has always wanted the full experience.
“I always knew I would love being pregnant, but not as much as I actually do,” Mallisa said. “I love seeing my stomach grow and watching Finn move around. I love feeling his hiccups, his kicks, his punches. I love knowing that my body has created this perfect little human being and is continuing to provide him with what he needs to grow and live outside the womb.”
Mallisa’s favorite part about the entire experience is seeing our sweet little boy move and I am inclined to agree.
“I could watch this sweet boy moving around all day (I actually do),” she said. “He must move a ton in his sleep, because he is constantly moving around. I hope he doesn’t get too uncomfortable in there.”
Mallisa struggled with food aversions early on in her pregnancy. I can vouch for this because she wouldn’t let me eat hibachi or crawfish. Ughhhhh! She would also get bad headaches. Lately, she is just big and uncomfortable (her words not mine).
“I wouldn’t trade any of those uncomfortable symptoms for the world,” she said. “It’s all part of my pregnancy journey and part of creating this baby.”
While Mallisa’s experience has been better than expected, Chelsea had no idea what she was signing up for when she found she was pregnant.
“I could have never expected what I would go through in these past 8 months. The joy is real. The emotions are daily. The aches and pain are indescribable and persistent,” Chelsea said. “Some people enjoy it, some people have a tough time.”
Chelsea admitted it is tougher more times than not, but she finds comfort in Emmett.
“Whether I’m at work, shopping at target, wide awake at 3am, crying or laughing, I am not alone in this and he loves to remind me with a quick right hook saying ‘Suck it up mom, you got this!,” she said.
Chelsea is a do it yourself kind of person so for her, pregnancy has been a catch-22.
“I get super frustrated when I can’t bend down, clean, sleep on my belly, take a bath comfortably, get up after laying back, eat a full meal without reflux, and catch my breath. Your body isn’t your body anymore-and that is huge adjustment,” Chelsea said.
On the flip side, she admits she likes that people are generally nicer and more generous to her because of her precious cargo.
“My most favorite thing is they SMILE when they see my belly. What’s happening inside my belly is miraculous, a reminder of God’s blessing to my life. My most prized possession is in there…my son,” she said.
Katie shared a similar level of uncertainty with pregnancy because all she knew was that there was a baby coming in nine months.
“Everyone I know who has been pregnant have all had different experiences, so I had no idea how mine would go,” Katie said. “I just pray for a healthy pregnancy, delivery and baby.”
Like Mallisa, her favorite part is watching and feeling her sweet Abby move. Her least favorite part is the aches and pains, but says it will all be worth it.
“It’s still crazy to me that there is a living human being inside me,” Katie said. “My two least favorite parts is back pain and not always being able to get comfortable. I also know it’s only going to get worse, but it will totally be worth it in the end.”
Being a Mom and Raising Your Children
One of the questions I asked these awesome expectant mothers was how they viewed each other as parents. This really is a testament to their friendship because they all view each other in the same light. All of them have a strong attachment to family and strong morals. The unique qualities that they predict will make them different as parents were all agreed upon.
I am sure Mallisa will wear this as a badge of honor and I know I will. Both Katie and Chelsea mentioned that there is no question that Finn will love Disney. You bet your ass he will if we have anything to say about it.
“I know Finn will grow up with a love for Disney which will bring out an imagination like no other,” Chelsea said. “And be spoiled rotten by his G!”
For the record, that is Mallisa’s dad, Grant. Apparently he will not go by grandpa, so he’s G…because he’s a fucking G.
They also mentioned that Mallisa will probably be the most strict mother of the bunch. They both agreed it will make her a great mother because she won’t be a pushover.
“It’s hard for a first time momma these days with the judgements people pass so easily, I know Mallisa will take any criticism with a grain of salt and move on. We all should,” Chelsea said. “She’ll also be the first I will call with baby feeding issues.”
Katie added, “She will be the mom on top of things. She loves to plan ahead and have things in order.”
Chelsea did make a proclamation that we will cave on our children not having fast food. I will raise you on that. Text me and let me know what you would like to bet.
Both Katie and Mallisa used the word maternal to describe Chelsea. She will be the laid back mom who will show love for her child through affection.
“Chelsea has always been the one who loves babies and who always manages to have a baby around,” Mallisa said. “She’s very maternal. She is going to love on Emmett so much and give him lots of snuggles.”
Chelsea believes Emmett will share a lot of those same qualities she has.
“I think he will smile a lot, want to give plenty hugs, and just be a happy baby. I’m a goofball who loves to sing and dance at home. He will be quite animated…very vocal with a Cajun flare,” Chelsea said.
I won’t bet against this one. With parents like Chelsea and Gavin, that kid definitely will be a goofball. So excite! (You know what Im talking about)
Outdoorsy. That is what both Mallisa and Chelsea used to describe Abby, which kind of ironic because Abby is the only girl.
“Katie is a little more outdoorsy than we are so I think that she will bring Abby on a lot of adventures,” Mallisa said. “They will go fishing on their boat a ton and just spend a lot of time outside, which will be a lot of fun for Abby.”
Chelsea added, “I picture Katie hauling a 30lb stroller up the levee on her days off with Abby on her other hip.”
One thing that stands out to Chelsea is based on Katie’s personality, she will have her daughter on a schedule by week 2, at least if it is up to her.
“Katie is a person of routine, she’s got her shit down pat,” Chelsea said. “If Abby has other plans than Katie does, I can picture a tiny freak out happening. But, we will all learn life isn’t on our time anymore.”
This is only the beginning for these three new moms. I know how excited they are to begin this journey.
“I am looking forward to sharing even more memories and milestones with them as we raising our children together,” Katie said. “I can only imagine the text and phone calls we will be sharing with each other as the children grow up.”
Mallisa and Chelsea shared the view that these babies will have built in friends for life. Let’s face it, Finn and Emmett sound like future Hall Of Fame athletes in my book.
Gavin can the teach post-play, dirty tricks and fundamentals. I will teach them how to run their mouth on a court and make it rain from three.
Mallisa feels the experience go going through everything together will not only create a bond between all of our children, but this will bring these three mothers even closer.
“I am looking forward to play dates, trips to the zoo, trips to the park, going to Target, just doing all the fun things of life with all of the babies. It’s going to be great having two other babies around to keep my baby entertained. I also can’t wait for sending our kids to school together and putting them in sports together,” Mallisa said. “We now have something that just bonds us together forever, stronger than just a friendship.”
Chelsea is glad to have these two girls close to her because that will eliminate the search for other friends with children.
“Not having to search for mommy friends is a blessing,” she said. “They are a phone call or literally streets away.”
Regardless of whether they become best friends or not, Mallisa, Chelsea and Katie are all excited for the adventure.
“Secretly we all think they will be college roommates at Havard…..actually I don’t want my “baby” that far away…Havard on the Bayou worked out just fine for us,” Chelsea said.
You damn right! Geaux Colonels!
To my wonderful wife Mallisa and our great friends Chelsea and Gavin and Katie and Kevin, let’s fucking do this!