I was born in 1991, which means I had the opportunity to experience growing up in the best decade ever. I will defend that until the end of time. I am almost positive my grave will read “fuck your opinions, 90s were the best. Your opinion is wrong.” stock-vector-memphis-poster-card-or-invitation-with-geometric-elements-sneakers-and-tape-cassette-we-are-the-512414632.jpg

I was feeding Finn the other day and I was thinking about all the things he will grow up with. What a great time to be alive. He grows up with information overload that I hope he learns how to use properly, unlike most of my peers. You know, the people who share memes and assume they are factual. Those morons. Technology is only getting better which is pretty exciting. It is easier now more than ever to build a brand for yourself because of social media sites. It is easier to research and educate yourself. I am curious to see where we are in five years.

However, nothing will beat the 90s. I decided to put together a list of my 10 favorite things about being a 90s kid.

10. TV Guide

I know this seems tedious in today’s age where we want it and want it now. I used to love hitting channel 4 on the tube and seeing what shows and movies were on. Before the days of a manual guide, you waited for the scroll to get through and it was exciting. The stations I anticipated most were HBO (5), 17 (TBS), 25 (TNT), 27 (MTV), 28 (TNT), 30 (Disney), 35 (ESPN), 45 (SciFi) and 65 (ABC Family). It is truly amazing I can remember those, but hey it was a staple of my childhood.

9. Landlines

I spent a lot of my time with my ear attached to the phone. Now, I hate that shit. But back then, I remember spending countless hours on the phone with my friends, especially Monday 7-10 and Thursday 8-10. I used to talk to my friends on three or four way calls while we all watched WWF. That was the tits.

8. Calling A Girl

Before the days of sliding into DMs, whatever the fuck that stupid shit means. We actually had to muster up the courage to call a girl. For me that usually sounded something like this… d1ecf8ba-f4aa-49b1-82b1-65d9d90414de-giphy.gif

Parent: Hello?
Me: Yes may I please speak to (girl)?
Parents: Yells for daughter
Girl: Hello?
Me: Hey! It’s M…muh…muh…Mike.
Girl: Hey! What’s up?
Me: Fine. Yeah. Oh I meant not much. I like your face.
*Hangs Up*

But in all seriousness, holy shit I used to stare at the phone for five minutes before actually calling and then sometimes I would just hang up. Going back and thinking about it, what a fucking rush man.

7. Old MTV

I have been watching The Challenge on MTV again and it is awesome. I missed that show. Back when I was growing up, we had TRL, Room Raiders, Next, Music Video Wake Up, Real World, Road Rules and of course The Miz before he became must see WWE TV. I miss the hell out of the old MTV. Truly great stuff.

6. Bill Fucking Clinton Bill-Clinton-570x320.jpg

I was thinking about putting CD’s here, but fuck that. No 90’s list is complete without Bill Clinton. Someone in the newsroom in college said “yeah I loved Bill Clinton because I remember getting a lot of toys when he was president.” Well said. Not to mention who didn’t love the fact that the favorite American pastime when he was in the oral office was swallow the leader.

5. Disney Channel

You can’t beat old Disney Channel, period. From the Disney Channel Original Movies to the shows, simply amazing. Speaking of, I watched Halloweentown 2: Kalabar’s Revenge the other day…fantastic. You had some of the best shows like Brotherly Love (Lawrence Brothers), Even Stevens, Lizzie McGuire, In A Heartbeat, Bug Juice, Famous Jett Jackson, The Jersey, Off the Wall and Mad Libs. Hell I even remember the Disney Channel Original Concerts. #BringItAllBack2017

4. 90s Pop NSYNC-ama-1998-billboard-1548.jpg

If you haven’t noticed, I have a slight obsession with pop music. I am not sure why. I just think it is fun and easy to listen to. Although it is more 80s than 90s, New Kids on the Block is always great. They opened the door for the two best boy bands of all time NSync and Backstreet Boys. NSync over everything. You also had Five, Savage Garden, 98 Degrees and BBmak.  Aside from the fantastic boy bands, you had some great female singers and bands like Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Mandy Moore, BWitched and Spice Girls. 90s pop over everything. Except maybe late 90s/early 2000s punk rock. There is just something inside me that sparks when I hear Candy by Mandy Moore.

3. Blockbuster

Nothing better than hitting up blockbuster on a Friday night. Those 5 day rentals were the shit. I used to always rent a movie and a video game to hold me over for the weekend. Thanks Bob! It would have to be returned on Wednesday and two days later we were back in business. Again, the convenience of Netflix and other streaming services are great. Finn will never get the taste of true happiness of walking into a world of movies and games and not knowing what to do with yourself.

2. Nintendo 64

While I can certainly dust it off and crank it up with Finn, he still won’t understand how state of the art the 64 was for our time. Goldeneye, Mario Party, Mario Kart, Super Mario 64, WCW/NWO Revenge, WWF Wrestlemania 2000, WWF No Mercy, Super Smash Brothers and NFL Blitz were all staples of my childhood. I remember having sleepovers and spending all night playing all of these. We had a four player 2v2 game of Goldeneye going and I remember playing the facility level. We (Me and my buddy Mike) were in the tanker rooms with rocket launchers and kept talking shit to the people we were playing to come on down to Mike’s auto shop. The second they opened the door, they were eating  rocket. Good times.

1. Our Social Network…Outside jugi2.jpg

Kids just don’t play outside anymore which is sad. I won’t pretend like a lot of my waking hours were not spent gaming because I have a toe thumb as a result. Button mash master supreme! But, if people were outside, I sure as hell was. I remember calling my friends at 10 am every Saturday because you didn’t call before then. I would see who was down for football, kickball, hide and seek, basketball, guns…whatever the hell we wanted. I remember spending a lot of weekdays after school until the street lights came on at my buddy Garrett’s place, my buddies Taylor and Brennan or my house with these dudes Jordan and Sean who both lived down the street. Weekends were spent down the street at my friend Nick’s house. It was the same routine for years. Then my buddy Alex moved in across the street and we would hang after school and on the weekends. There was nothing like riding a bike or walking down the street to find a bunch of bikes in the driveway knowing we had a full squad for a front yard game of baseball or football.


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