When I embarked on the journey of fatherhood, obviously there are values and morals I hope to instill in my son. One of those values is treating your girl right.
My wife and I started dating at a young and immature age of 15. Here we are at 28. Still together and happily married with an amazing son. We made it! We continue to strive for a better relationship.
I have made plenty of mistakes and I will continue to make mistakes. It is all part of the process. I can tell you that I have done a bunch of growing up especially in the last 4-5 years of our relationship.
In the past, I have said things to her that I should not have said. I used to expect more from her than I was willing to give in our relationship. In fact, I used to be fairly selfish with our relationship. I would always take but sometimes I just wasn’t willing to give.
I can remember the first time I made her cry and how terrible I felt and then once we reached a certain point, it became a goal to make her cry when we fought. We fought like hell to be together through some bad times.
None of that is ok. As I’ve gotten older, one of my greatest attributes I feel is accountability and being able to admit my mistakes. I am certainly not proud of any of the wrongs I have done. The laundry list is much longer, but I figure you can get the short version.
Of course, no relationship is perfect. I still say things I don’t mean. I still get mad at things I shouldn’t. But I do consciously make an effort every single day to be the best husband and father I can be.
I want to leave this world better than I found it. I want my son and other children we may have to look up to me and know that I didn’t let them down. I answered the call of being their role model. One of the biggest footprints you can leave on this world is through the children who look up to you.
When you are with the same girl basically your entire life, you share a special bond that includes many firsts. You don’t get the luxury of starting fresh and learning from past mistakes. You learn from them but then you have to move on from them too. And most importantly, you do so through forgiveness. You stop keeping score.
I wouldn’t want to live life with anyone else as a result. I hope he one day finds someone as special to him as my wife is to me. Although I can speak for us when I say, I hope it doesn’t happen too quickly.
Seeing my wife with our child is the single greatest gift I have ever received. Just last night, I was going through old pictures of us and then pictures of those two. It’s a nice reminder to slow down as much as possible because life moves too fucking fast. We can earn more money. We can have more things. The one thing we can never get back is time.
I think we do a fair job of making the most of it, especially her. That little boy adores the ground she walks on. He is 100% his mom’s son and has been since the two of them locked eyes. Him being a mama’s boy is perfectly fine by me. She’s a great one.
That being said, last Sunday was one of those days that serves as a reminder why you decided to build a family together. Aside from him splashing in puddles from all the rain, we busted out the pool and water table and spent our Sunday outside prior to the rain.
After I had gotten out of the pool, I changed my clothes and sat under the carport as my son played with his water table and my wife sat in the pool still. My wife got hold of the water gun that he was playing with and decided to start pelting me with it. I got up and attempted to grab her to throw her down in the pool, playfully of course.
When I did, my son freaked out. He didn’t cry or anything, but he started screaming. He freaked because I put my hands on his mama. Big no no. Once he realized we were messing around, all was fine. His reaction just made me happy and proud knowing that maybe, just maybe I am doing this whole dad thing right.
It was cool to see him do his best to protect the first woman he will ever love. Granted, he is two. Not to sound like a bad ass or anything, but I could take him.
That being said, protect her every opportunity you can, always. You keep her heart and spirit near and dear to you. You look out for her, always.
It is important to protect the women we love from harm, both physically and emotionally. I hope he never loses sight of that.
If at any point I lose sight of that, well, I hope he is the first one in my face knocking me out cold to protect his mama. She deserves that.
Kudos to that kid for once again making me proud to be his dad. Here’s to all the dads with sons who inevitably became the third wheel because you had a mama’s boy. (Chugs beer)
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