Since Covid began spreading throughout the United States, our normal has been punched into oblivion which goes without saying. As Halloween crept up on us, I viewed it the same way I view most things at this point, we’ll see.

It is hard for me to consciously take part in certain things when I can’t control the actions of others and what they are doing. In full transparency, I expected to let my three year old son go pick candy out of baskets around the house and the yard depending on the situation.

Not because I want it to be that way because I want him to experience a normal childhood. However, we are not living in normal times. I have written about this before and talked about it on the podcast that my son’s normal has turned into non-existent because of the virus…or to him, “diarrhea going around.” That will never not be funny.

There are certain things we won’t do because assholes can’t adhere to certain protocols.

Trick or treating was a shining example of something I was unsure about. As previously stated in the blog, we recently moved to a small town outside of Atlanta, GA. Luckily, our neighborhood and street is spaced out compared to our old home in Louisiana. Houses are not on top of one another like they are there. The streets are also quite large. So we were able to go trick or treating like we would any other year.

Plan A was a trunk or treat event at a church less than a minute from our house. However, that failed miserably. It was packed, which is fine. The problem was that hardly anyone was wearing a mask and people were on top of one another. Just irresponsible behavior by ignorant fools. That’s going to be a hard no from me.

wHy CaN’t tHiNgS Be NoRmAL? Because of dickheads like you acting as if things are normal regardless.

Plan B was trick or treat on our street. We did and I would say plan B was a major success.

It wasn’t crowded. We weren’t in close contract with many people and we got a head start on other trick or treaters. My son was happy since he had a sense of normalcy.

He loved going last year. He loved getting to wear his puppy costume. He loved riding in his wagon. He felt so fondly about it that one of his blankets is now called his “Halloween blanket.”

Now that he is a little older, he ran the streets dressed in his dope ass pirate costume while little sister rode in the stroller dressed as a parrot. Fucking adorable!

The best part about the street we live on is they do Halloween right. These people go all out for this shit. Our neighbors were slow cooking next door with their family and had huge buckets of candy set up on a table to pass out. Pretty sure 40% of the candy he got came from them.

One of the houses created a pirate ship in their driveway as their whole family was rocking pirate costumes. It was only natural they welcomed my dude (a fellow pirate) with open arms. In order to maintain proper social distancing, they attached a PVC pipe to the side of their pirate ship as a cannon. They would send the candy down the pipe in a little bag and played a firing cannon when they dropped it through. They were kind enough to give a fellow pirate two ziplocked bags full of good booty.

The last memorable house was further down the street. They had a huge piece of plywood in their yard saying “Due to Covid, do not cross here” and chalked the driveway for where to stand. The guy set up a cannon of some sort in the bed of his truck. He was launching candy about 40-50 feet into the air allowing it to land in his lawn. So of course my dude ran around collecting all the fruity tootsie rolls he could find.

Now, I can’t wait to eat half of his candy as well as go through all of it with him at some point tomorrow.

Following trick or treating, we came back home and sat in the driveway by the firepit for a while before heading to bed. I am just happy my dude got to enjoy Halloween despite more outbreaks and shit happening with Covid.

We’re onto Christmas.

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